Two weeks ago I learned that Dr. Hudson Armerding, past President of Wheaton College (1965-1982) passed away.  He would have been President during the student days of a number of Wheaton grads in our congregation.  This was a strong man of God and great scholar.  Though I only knew Dr. Armerding as an acquaintance through his service on the board of Covenant Seminary, I admired him as an exceptional servant-leader.  While from his students there are numerous stories of his humility expressed in public apologies or acts of reconciliation, there is one story he told about himself during one of his visits to St. Louis that has stayed with me.  A former officer in the Navy, Dr. Armerding was sensitive to those who appeared unpatriotic.  During his presidency, Dr. Armerding received complaints about a professor at Wheaton who was commending the pacifism of his denomination to his students.  The professor was a very close friend of Dr. Armerding but nevertheless he hurriedly called in the man and chewed him out.  The friend and professor humbly accepted the rebuke and agreed not to teach his views in public any longer.  Dr. Armerding said that as President he had done what needed to be done and he won the battle.  However, he lost the war.  Later he realized that he had been too strong with the man so he apologized and asked his forgiveness.  A godly brother, the professor said he forgave Dr. Armerding.  But Dr. Armerding said that their friendship was never the same.  Every time they greeted one another, there was the evidence of deep pain in the man’s eyes.  While there was reconciliation, the sweetness of their friendship had been permanently lost.  Dr. Armerding drew out this principle of leadership for the young men who were listening to him tell the story:  “While you must never turn away from saying hard things when they are necessary, carefully pray about how you say them.  Carefully weigh the future cost of speaking truth in carelessness and without love.  Sometimes ‘I’m sorry’ will never repair the damage you have done.”  May King Jesus teach all of us as leaders how to use our authority wisely and sensitively.